Lilly BeSoer Photo: RNZ Pacific / Scott Waide
It is difficult to count the number of times Lilly BeSoer, her family, and her staff have been in physical danger.
When she speaks at public engagements, she mentions some of the many close calls in passing and usually with a good natured smile.
She does not really dwell on those harrowing moments in her life. But each incident is a lesson she adds to her years of work as a human rights defender.
Each lesson is added to a mental playbook containing "standard operating procedures" that she passes on to her younger staff.
A voice for change
Lilly BeSoer runs a community based organisation called Voice For Change (VfC) out of Jiwaka province in the Papua New Guinea Highlands.
Since the organisation's inception more than 10 years ago, VfC has found itself weaving though complex mazes of male-dominated highlands cultures where women continue to struggle to find their place in the 21st century.
The organisation's base is situated on customary land, along the Highlands Highway between Jiwaka and Western Highlands provinces, and it has become an unofficial refuge for women and men fleeing sorcery related violence and tribal fighting.
"We don't get any support from the government for the women," she said.
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"But if we don't help them, where will they go?
"We pay for their food. A bag of rice is expensive. If they come with their children, we have to look after them."
Fleeing violence within communities, there are no systems that provide safe spaces. Women fleeing from violent marriages cannot easily return to their families after bride price is paid.
They are usually rejected. Widows with children are sometimes violently forced off land belonging to their deceased husband's clan.
"We have to take them to the police and support them through the process," BeSoer said.
"The justice process takes very long. Other times, police bring victims of violence to us because they can't deal with the long-term care and rehabilitation that's needed for them."
The victims of violence come from village communities all around.
Some some with horrific injuries and the responsibility of medical care is taken up by VfC. BeSoer's passion for the work stems from her own personal experience.
Personal experiences
When her children were little, she had to take them and flee from her husband's village in the MulBaiyer District of Western Highlands because of tribal violence.
But the move came at a personal cost.
Her son would be cut off from customary land belonging to his father's clan - his future inheritance.
For an outsider, this may not seem like much. But for the patrilineal society, a boy needs to be firmly rooted on his land and in his culture in order to thrive.
Despite fleeing from the violence, she chose to return with VfC, determined to work with the Baiyer community.
This has meant opening a branch office on family land. It is a personal story but one that resonates with many other Papua New Guinea woman who worryabout the future of their sons displaced by violence.
"My son has to be able to go back to his father's people. That's where he belongs," she sahed.
Her work had led VfC to become the most visible advocate for human rights in Jiwaka and the Western Highlands.
Bigger responsibilities
In 2023, her organisation was chosen to lead a United Nations (UN) funded program for Women's Peace and Security.
It was part of the implementation of a UN Security Council resolution to build resilient communities and raise women leaders in conflict zones around the world.
Through the program, 16 communities in Jiwaka and Western Highlands were identified and their representatives brought in to be trained as peace builders.
One of the primary outcomes would be the creation of community by-laws that would address issues such as violence and crime.
For the organisation, it would mean significant strides in addressing the concerns from the ground up.
However, VfC found that implementing UN Security Council resolutions of which the PNG government is a signatory, was extremely difficult.
First communities had to accept change and participants of the training found that they couldn't easily implement the program donor's expectations across clan boundaries.
The needs were very different and people just didn't care about the UN's aspirations.
It was a steep learning curve for BeSoer and her team of human rights defenders.
"When I started Voice for Change and began working with communities, I thought I knew my own culture and my people," she said.
"I didn't. I had to learn again."
Important lessons
Members of the communities had to find what was important to the people and build acceptance. Out the the 16 communities, 13 chose to develop and accept their own by-laws.
One of the important lessons that came to the fore was that even with the close proximity of clans and villages, no two sets of laws are the same.
One community leader said if donor partners want to work with organisations in Papua New Guinea, they would have to engage at the clan level. It's tedious work and deadlines cannot be easily imposed on communities.
