British backpacker Grace Millane, who was murdered in Auckland in 2018. Photo: supplied Love Grace NZ
The mother of Grace Millane says there is still a lot of work to do to get justice for victims of abuse.
It comes as the Love Grace handbag appeal kicks off in New Zealand on Friday to help women experiencing domestic abuse.
Gillian Millane has campaigned against the rough sex defence used by Grace's murderer Jesse Kempson.
The British backpacker was strangled to death by Kempson in 2018, after a Tinder date in Auckland on the eve of her 22nd birthday.
Detective Scott Beard, who lead the investigation into her death, was also vocal on the defence re-victimsing the Millane family through the rough sex defence.
Gillian Millane told Nine to Noon bureaucracy is getting in the way of change.
"We have helped to change the law in England and Wales, unfortunately there's a long way to go. But that's probably down to politicians and lawyers and me but I stand by that, I think it should be called what it is, it's murder, not rough sex," Millane said.
She said she would be in favour of following Australia's lead to introduce a code of conduct for dating apps that was enforced in October.
"I wholeheartedly support anything that would make woman, anybody safe, you know it's got to be a good thing."
Millane spoke about the ongoing affect Grace's death has had on her.
She said to channel her grief she's been training to climb Mount Kilimanjaro and Mount Everest Base Camp which has given her a sense of purpose and a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
"I climb mountains every day... even if it's getting out of bed. Anybody that lives in this world, whether you've had someone taken from you, you know a win is getting up and having a shower sometimes.
"So for me, I think right, I climb mountains everyday so why not climb a real one so that's what my thought process was for Kili and then I thought well Everest is there so why not do that one."
She talked about leaving stones behind to represent her late husband David and her daughter Grace.
"As far as I'm concerned they're travelling with me, and if someone picks them up and puts them somewhere else, they go somewhere else."
Millane started the charity Love Grace in honour of her daughter which saw her receive an OBE from Prince William and an award from former Prime Minister Boris Johnson.
When it started in 2019, it started off with between 50 to 100 handbags and has now filled over 23,000.
Last year the appeal set a target of 1500 handbags for the whole country, but was surprised to see 5269 were donated to local Women's Refuges around New Zealand.
This year there are 120 drop off points throughout the country and 163 volunteers.
"My driving force is really, I just don't want another family, another mum, dad, brother, sister, aunty, friends, have to live the life that we do. I just want help... to sort of hopefully raise the awareness, hopefully change things... that's what I'm hoping," Millane said.
Each bag has six key items including shampoo, conditioner, shower gel, deodorant, toothpaste, toothbrush and other luxury items which are gifted to Women's Refuge.
Each bag also contained a poppy drawn by Grace and a note saying "you matter".
New Zealand co-ordinator Kylie-Anne Kearney said she was amazed with last year's response and how quickly her team has grown from only seven people in 2020.
"This year we've doubled the amount of co-ordinators, doubled the amount of drop off points so we're expecting that is going to be even bigger which we're super excited about," Kearney said.
The Love Grace handbag appeal runs until 8 March.
